I Actually Didn't Even Know That:Kaitlan Collins Leaves Jim Jordan at a Loss to Explain Why GOP Hasn't Sworn in Democrat

[gfarber]

8. Grijalva swearing in

Said Johnson, “There’s nothing to do,
The chamber is empty, it’s true.”
But Grijalva’s not sworn,
Though her seat’s duly worn—
Seems her vote might expose quite a few.

Jim Jordan stepped up to explain,
With a line that was shaky and plain.
“It’s tradition,” he cried,
But the facts just denied—
And Collins was swift to detain.

Kaitlan Collins, with poise and with sass,
Called out the evasion with class.
“Then why,” she inquired,
“Were two others just hired—
In pro forma? That doesn’t quite pass.”

They claim it’s just House protocol,
But whispers say that’s not it at all.
For Epstein’s sealed file
Could stretch half a mile—
And Grijalva’s vote might make it fall.

“It’s special,” said Jordan, “you see,
A new member should get to feel free.
With speeches and flair,
A crowd that is there!”—
But two swore in with no marquee.

Two-eighteen’s a number they dread,
If Grijalva is finally led.
It could crack the disguise
That conceals certain ties—
To secrets they’d rather stay dead.

So here we are stuck in a game,
Where excuses are always the same.
But Kaitlan was sharp,
She punctured the harp—
And left Jordan retreating in shame.