Can anyone tell me how much help they receive from hospice at their home?

[Ilsa]

My MIL has dementia, it's getting pretty bad, and hospice comes twice a week to bathe her. A nurse comes once a week to order supplies (pullups, bed pads, reorder prescriptions, etc) and take her vitals.

Everything else is on us (mostly me), getting her food, washing clothes, dishes, etc, changing her bed pads and draw sheet, etc. Also, cleaning up her messes, finding items she's moved around, and putting up with her deteriorating personality.

I'm wondering if the aide and nurse are worth it, since we have to coordinate so much. So far, I think if it wasn't for the 4-5 days respite, I'd drop it.

We are working on getting her VA benefits approved so I'll get about 15-16 hours per week in help.

Thank you for your responses.