General Discussion

lumberjack_jeff

(33,224 posts)

187. No, you are not the choir at all. You are singing something else.

Wed Apr 10, 2013, 01:52 PM

Apr 2013

Why are men who were raped by other men somehow less victimized? That is the inescapable implication of your post upthread.

If it could be shown that comparable numbers of rapes are inflicted on men as women in a year, would you still believe that the men aren't really victims because the perpetrators are also men?

This question gets at the core of the issue. Is the point of talking about rape culture, rape awareness, and organizations like beyond survival, to reduce the frequency of rape, and to mitigate the physical and psychological harm it causes?... or is it just a rhetorical jawbone to whack men in general? If males aren't eligible for advocacy as victims because they are men like the perpetrators, then it's hard to avoid the conclusion that it's all about the jawbone.

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Teen: I Was Raped by 4 200-Pound Women [View all] Purveyor Apr 2013 OP

I don't quite get the 200 lb part but it's still an unusual story. I know it is.. BlueJazz Apr 2013 #1

Just keep on stimulating that prostate. TheMadMonk Apr 2013 #23

TMI trumad Apr 2013 #75

ding ding ding thread winner ... !!!!! :D nt littlewolf Apr 2013 #85

I rarely actually alcibiades_mystery Apr 2013 #99

Perhaps it made it easier to overpower him? BainsBane Apr 2013 #28

He just wanted to point out that since they were fat Warpy Apr 2013 #42

"it's possible as long as they didn't allow him to climax" TheDebbieDee Apr 2013 #88

Or you know, it's a description of his attackers tammywammy Apr 2013 #97

At that age reaching climax without "deflating" is the norm FreakinDJ Apr 2013 #255

They could have spiked his drink with viagra Turborama Apr 2013 #64

Or the women could have used *ahem* adapter kits, available in almost any reputable sex shop. TheMightyFavog Apr 2013 #173

Probably wickerwoman Apr 2013 #71

Oh..I see...didn't think of that. Boy..sometimes the world gets a little stranger .. BlueJazz Apr 2013 #216

do reporters tell the weight of male rapists in their stories? sheesh. eom ellenfl Apr 2013 #188

Of course they do, if they're asking for the public's help in tracking them down. polly7 Apr 2013 #192

but that headline doesn't say she was raped by a 200 lb man she met online. ellenfl Apr 2013 #200

No, it sure doesn't. polly7 Apr 2013 #202

but not in the headline . . . that was my point. eom ellenfl Apr 2013 #250

It is provided as an answer to the question of his credibility lumberjack_jeff Apr 2013 #209

Who specifically is blaming the male victim in this instance? LanternWaste Apr 2013 #246

The question was asked why the women's weight was relevant. lumberjack_jeff Apr 2013 #262

I think the idea -- which still could be silly -- is that they were large/strong DirkGently Apr 2013 #249

Yep..that's what was going on in my mind also. "Mrs Smith was raped by a 214 pound male" BlueJazz Apr 2013 #215

It's a germane answer to the question "why didn't you just leave?" n/t lumberjack_jeff Apr 2013 #194

That is why "all men are potential.rapists" stance was so wrong. darkangel218 Apr 2013 #2

What is wrong is your understanding. nt ZombieHorde Apr 2013 #7

How so? nt darkangel218 Apr 2013 #15

If a man is changing a tire out in the middle of nowhere, ZombieHorde Apr 2013 #103

Still doesnt validate that All men are potential rapists. darkangel218 Apr 2013 #106

It's not about the men in our lives that we love and charish. ZombieHorde Apr 2013 #122

I agree with you. "Rape can and is committed by both sexes." In_The_Wind Apr 2013 #13

If "all humans are potential rapists but Warren Stupidity Apr 2013 #17

Yes rape can be committed by both. Luminous Animal Apr 2013 #25

Something very important happened to me reading your reply Mira Apr 2013 #27

Thank you, Mira. Thank you so much. Luminous Animal Apr 2013 #33

I can understand what you are saying well. Mira Apr 2013 #38

I sent mine to self-defense training. They really appreciated it. JDPriestly Apr 2013 #54

Me too. Thank you. LiberalLoner Apr 2013 #70

Just because most rapes are committed by men, it doesnt mean ALL men are potential rapists. darkangel218 Apr 2013 #30

Dear darkangel218, I believe that you are not a rapist so... Luminous Animal Apr 2013 #36

Lmao!! you have trust issues then , if you are afraid of and want to avoid the 8 billion people darkangel218 Apr 2013 #39

Why would she trust you? Fawke Em Apr 2013 #46

Living in fear is a choice. darkangel218 Apr 2013 #49

Um, I kicked my first husband's ass. Fawke Em Apr 2013 #52

The sharp defense skill that I posed to you in my questions that you've not answered Luminous Animal Apr 2013 #57

BTW, the husband who tells me I have trust issues Fawke Em Apr 2013 #50

I'm so sorry to hear these things happened to you n/t deutsey Apr 2013 #182

Where have I once stated most men would consider rape... Luminous Animal Apr 2013 #47

There is no point in dragging this on and on. darkangel218 Apr 2013 #55

I hope you realize... someday Fawke Em Apr 2013 #62

I thought dark angel was female BainsBane Apr 2013 #79

Yea, so did I. SammyWinstonJack Apr 2013 #83

Dragging this on and on? chervilant Apr 2013 #86

You confuse the word potential with probable or future. Luminous Animal Apr 2013 #40

Someone in an elevator could potentially be robbed or even killed by a female. darkangel218 Apr 2013 #43

Not all your life. Fawke Em Apr 2013 #53

Are young men taught to not get in an elevator when the only occupent of that elevator is a female? Luminous Animal Apr 2013 #56

According to DoJ, 99% of all rapists in the US are men. KitSileya Apr 2013 #68

Yes, actually, to an outside observer, we are Scootaloo Apr 2013 #58

Thank you for this post. n/t TDale313 Apr 2013 #60

Potential can be there for both sexes, for pretty much anything. darkangel218 Apr 2013 #61

Only if you ignore Crime statistics BainsBane Apr 2013 #73

less than 1% of rapists are women BainsBane Apr 2013 #72

Agree. It's almost like saying, "All black people are potential muggers." TimberValley Apr 2013 #82

Thank you for this post. TDale313 Apr 2013 #41

That's a pretty grim world you live in. Maybe this will make you feel a bit better: Comrade Grumpy Apr 2013 #51

What I find amazing about some of the replies to your post justiceischeap Apr 2013 #76

Only 1 in 4? It has to be higher than that. I personally have been physically grabbed twice (both Nay Apr 2013 #138

Good post! Starboard Tack Apr 2013 #117

good post. been there, thought that. eom ellenfl Apr 2013 #191

Plus one million. LanternWaste Apr 2013 #248

Substitute woman/female in your post with black/hispanic and gasp with outrage yet the Purveyor Apr 2013 #257

How about you do it using my questions and I'll answer. Luminous Animal Apr 2013 #258

No, that is the truth, and it is not a wrong stance. liberalmuse Apr 2013 #44

I disagree with you. Its a sexist remark and not true. darkangel218 Apr 2013 #59

I disagree with you. You are sexist and don't believe in truth. Fawke Em Apr 2013 #63

I am sexist?? how, by pointing out a sexist stance?? darkangel218 Apr 2013 #65

You need to understand something Warpy Apr 2013 #45

There will always be criminals. darkangel218 Apr 2013 #67

BECAUSE THERE IS NO WAY FOR A WOMAN, OR A MAN, TO 'SEE' WHICH STRANGER IS Nay Apr 2013 #150

You know just as well as me that what statement does is generalizing darkangel218 Apr 2013 #159

You aren't this stupid. jeff47 Apr 2013 #184

Perheps you should learn how to hold a conversation without insulting darkangel218 Apr 2013 #198

Why? jeff47 Apr 2013 #228

You obviously have issues, i feel bad for you. So much anger cant be good. darkangel218 Apr 2013 #234

+1000 smirkymonkey Apr 2013 #238

Appropriate precautions are only insulting to those who fear appropriate precautions... LanternWaste Apr 2013 #247

It is the Man's Responsibility? Macoy51 Apr 2013 #80

It's men's responsibility to change men jeff47 Apr 2013 #183

Only You Can Fix Yourself Macoy51 Apr 2013 #201

+10000000 darkangel218 Apr 2013 #204

people enable rape in all kinds of ways BainsBane Apr 2013 #217

Still can't comprehend the point then? jeff47 Apr 2013 #229

if You Lost the Argument, Throw Insults Macoy51 Apr 2013 #264

That would be "white-knighting". redgreenandblue Apr 2013 #223

No, that would be you deflecting jeff47 Apr 2013 #230

Your words were "men should change men". redgreenandblue Apr 2013 #263

nice hijack salin Apr 2013 #78

Its a discussion board ffs. darkangel218 Apr 2013 #89

I used to think that way when younger. GaYellowDawg Apr 2013 #90

I undersand what youre saying. However, teaching young girls/women darkangel218 Apr 2013 #92

Oh, I don't think so. GaYellowDawg Apr 2013 #95

I completely disagree with you. darkangel218 Apr 2013 #100

thank you! renate Apr 2013 #114

To be honest GaYellowDawg Apr 2013 #259

That is a very good explanation of "All (anything) does (anything)". There is nothing wrong with bike man Apr 2013 #210

Thank you for getting it! smirkymonkey Apr 2013 #239

I didn't get it for a long time. GaYellowDawg Apr 2013 #260

It's not a stance. It's a distortion of an explanation. redqueen Apr 2013 #108

How precisely does the one deny the other? LanternWaste Apr 2013 #245

i have a weird feeling about this story...not one, but *four* 200-pound women? who raped him HiPointDem Apr 2013 #3

Nope. Four 200 pound women , once each. Even hmmmmier. pkdu Apr 2013 #5

yes. fixed. brain slower than fingers. HiPointDem Apr 2013 #11

I am going to come clean and admit I first thought the title read dsc Apr 2013 #4

WWII. That thought made you "come clean".... You may need help! pkdu Apr 2013 #6

So did I. Without the pun, lol. nt LWolf Apr 2013 #87

In this thread: Double standards... Comrade_McKenzie Apr 2013 #8

Really? A Little Weird Apr 2013 #35

bullshit. I expressed doubt about the woman in NE cali Apr 2013 #84

This message was self-deleted by its author seaglass Apr 2013 #94

Strange how the women were all about the same weight and height. nt ZombieHorde Apr 2013 #9

I find this very hard to believe. MrSlayer Apr 2013 #10

So you're saying temporary311 Apr 2013 #12

Haha! Nice. MrSlayer Apr 2013 #16

Actually, yeah, it can still happen. temporary311 Apr 2013 #20

Some systems work regardless of circumstances. KitSileya Apr 2013 #69

no FightForMichigan Apr 2013 #226

The article itself says 'sexually assaulted', so it could have been anything. polly7 Apr 2013 #14

You're right. MrSlayer Apr 2013 #22

It is in fact highly probable that direct genital stimulation can cause an erection. Gravitycollapse Apr 2013 #19

Not for me. MrSlayer Apr 2013 #34

Use your imagination. darkangel218 Apr 2013 #21

Yeah, I kind of went off half cocked on that one. MrSlayer Apr 2013 #31

He doesn't have to function for it to be rape though... octothorpe Apr 2013 #29

Yep, I was wrong on that. MrSlayer Apr 2013 #32

again, you assume a certain sex act is the only way rape can occur. You lack imagination. CBGLuthier Apr 2013 #81

sex doesn't necessarily require an erect penis datasuspect Apr 2013 #91

Yes, interesting. Not that it is impossible, but it does seem kind of fishy. smirkymonkey Apr 2013 #240

I hope they're caught and prosecuted. Horrible thing for this young man. nt. polly7 Apr 2013 #18

My heart goes out to this young man. TDale313 Apr 2013 #24

I hope they're caught as well. liberalmuse Apr 2013 #48

agreed. salin Apr 2013 #77

Totally agree. jessie04 Apr 2013 #243

I must admit to doing a triple take BainsBane Apr 2013 #26

"Sexual assaults by females on males are not unheard of in Toronto, a detective tells the Post." JI7 Apr 2013 #37

Post removed Post removed Apr 2013 #66

....... cali Apr 2013 #74

But what? EOTE Apr 2013 #109

Would there be so much scrutiny here had a teenage girl been raped by four guys... Poll_Blind Apr 2013 #93

No. GaYellowDawg Apr 2013 #96

Thanks for your posts on this thread. nt redqueen Apr 2013 #112

No problem. GaYellowDawg Apr 2013 #261

This message was self-deleted by its author seaglass Apr 2013 #98

All wearing theKed Apr 2013 #221

This message was self-deleted by its author seaglass Apr 2013 #232

Is it outside the realm of possibility? theKed Apr 2013 #237

This message was self-deleted by its author seaglass Apr 2013 #252

More men are raped in Amerca then women. Men almost never report on female rapists. Exultant Democracy Apr 2013 #101

"More men are raped in Amerca then women" LancetChick Apr 2013 #102

I have seen an article that claimed man-on-man prison rape happened more frequently ZombieHorde Apr 2013 #105

Who is the perpetrator of all these rapes against men? boston bean Apr 2013 #104

men rape men too datasuspect Apr 2013 #129

no kidding, that is why I asked the question. boston bean Apr 2013 #132

when you consider that institutionalized rape datasuspect Apr 2013 #134

you are preaching to the choir, boston bean Apr 2013 #136

i honestly don't care datasuspect Apr 2013 #140

That's nice.. boston bean Apr 2013 #145

yeah datasuspect Apr 2013 #156

No, you are not the choir at all. You are singing something else. lumberjack_jeff Apr 2013 #187

No, you are making things up Jeff, that I never said. boston bean Apr 2013 #190

Then what did you mean by "who is perpetrating all those rapes?" lumberjack_jeff Apr 2013 #193

Uh, he was saying it was women. boston bean Apr 2013 #195

Yet, you refuse to answer my question. lumberjack_jeff Apr 2013 #196

There was no question, just a bunch of bullshit accusations. boston bean Apr 2013 #197

No. "?" is known as a question mark. lumberjack_jeff Apr 2013 #199

No it is not. boston bean Apr 2013 #205

Then you misunderstood what he wrote lumberjack_jeff Apr 2013 #207

No, you made up stupid crap. boston bean Apr 2013 #208

What you say can't be reconciled with other things you say. lumberjack_jeff Apr 2013 #212

in your inflated ego. boston bean Apr 2013 #222

Crickets? lumberjack_jeff Apr 2013 #203

I see this a lot. lumberjack_jeff Apr 2013 #181

Of course it is. boston bean Apr 2013 #233

You'll need to post a link for this preposterous claim. Sheldon Cooper Apr 2013 #107

Does prison rape not count or something? EOTE Apr 2013 #111

It's because of the way he said it. redqueen Apr 2013 #113

Why is it disingenuous to point out that men are being raped in far larger numbers than most people EOTE Apr 2013 #115

That's not what he said. boston bean Apr 2013 #119

Here's what he said: EOTE Apr 2013 #120

He was responding to the claim boston bean Apr 2013 #123

But he was suggesting that not including them would be the default. EOTE Apr 2013 #125

He doesn't believe the bullshit claim boston bean Apr 2013 #128

My numbers? Not very good at following a conversation, are you? EOTE Apr 2013 #130

He was including them for you, and you took offense. boston bean Apr 2013 #133

I took offense at the suggestion that prison rape shouldn't be included by default. EOTE Apr 2013 #146

Well, I would like to suggest that boston bean Apr 2013 #147

He DIDN'T KNOW that it should be included. EOTE Apr 2013 #152

Because the poster didn't include it by saying that boston bean Apr 2013 #155

Christ, I have no intention of defending things I haven't said. You should really get off that. EOTE Apr 2013 #164

I'm not asking you to explain anything. boston bean Apr 2013 #166

Read my post 167. EOTE Apr 2013 #170

You said "More men are raped in America then women" Marrah_G Apr 2013 #137

No, I did not. EOTE Apr 2013 #144

I'm sorry, I mixed you up with the one who started this sub-thread Marrah_G Apr 2013 #160

No problem. nt EOTE Apr 2013 #171

Nope that is exacly what I was saying. Exultant Democracy Apr 2013 #124

It's not. redqueen Apr 2013 #131

I don't know if that's true or not. EOTE Apr 2013 #141

There is indeed less recourse in prison. redqueen Apr 2013 #158

I have less issue with broadbrushing now. EOTE Apr 2013 #175

I doubt if you're really curious, but I'll explain anyway: Sheldon Cooper Apr 2013 #116

I doubt you're much one for thinking, but I'll explain anyway: EOTE Apr 2013 #118

The reply SC was responding wasn't talking about that. Are their co-ed prisons? boston bean Apr 2013 #142

Are THERE co-ed prisons? Not that I know of. EOTE Apr 2013 #148

Yes, but it still doesn't make the claim that more men are raped than women. boston bean Apr 2013 #153

I never made that claim. EOTE Apr 2013 #154

I didn't say you did. boston bean Apr 2013 #157

You're asking me to defend something I didn't say, that's stupid. EOTE Apr 2013 #162

No I am not. boston bean Apr 2013 #163

Responding to ridiculous claims with more ridiculousness is not helpful. EOTE Apr 2013 #167

I could see if your ire were focused on the person the poster was responding to. boston bean Apr 2013 #172

Then I'm over the top. EOTE Apr 2013 #176

That isn't what the poster said at all. boston bean Apr 2013 #178

I've posted it almost a dozen times now. EOTE Apr 2013 #179

yeah, but what your quoting isn't equalling what you are boston bean Apr 2013 #180

I would respond to that if I were capable of deciphering it. nt EOTE Apr 2013 #186

I never "added that women are doing most of it to men." Keep your words out of my mouth. Exultant Democracy Apr 2013 #149

You framed it that way. Perhaps you should edit. nt redqueen Apr 2013 #151

Your resposnible for your own close reading. I most definitly do not want to reframe, Exultant Democracy Apr 2013 #161

Back up the claim that more men are raped than women. boston bean Apr 2013 #165

post 143 Exultant Democracy Apr 2013 #168

You're using the "all men are potential rapists" canard as if it had any validity. redqueen Apr 2013 #169

You can't be serious, Sheldon Cooper Apr 2013 #189

I don't play rugby either, but then I'm not very good at it. EOTE Apr 2013 #206

fucking disgusting lying bullshit. cali Apr 2013 #121

DOJ, the Bureau of justice statistics and the National Prison Rape Elimination Commission. Exultant Democracy Apr 2013 #143

Those links tell us more men are raped than women? boston bean Apr 2013 #174

If you add up the numbers they do. Which led to a series of articles like this last year Exultant Democracy Apr 2013 #177

In prisons, not the general population BainsBane Apr 2013 #214

You must have only looked at the first tow, because you are incorrect. Exultant Democracy Apr 2013 #219

statistics BainsBane Apr 2013 #256

The numbers they give for male rape is about 10 times lower then what the DOJ and BOJ have Exultant Democracy Apr 2013 #265

Rape in prison somehow doesn't count? theKed Apr 2013 #225

Thanks -- that article was very interesting. CokeMachine Apr 2013 #224

There are some problems with the comparisons boston bean Apr 2013 #236

it's prison rape only BainsBane Apr 2013 #213

Rape is rape if you add up the numbers my premise holds. Exultant Democracy Apr 2013 #220

The reports you provided are about prisons BainsBane Apr 2013 #251

Your post is the disgusting post. I didn't realize a very pubic news story from last year Exultant Democracy Apr 2013 #266

I think you forgot your sarcasm emote Marrah_G Apr 2013 #126

rape is part of the institutional process datasuspect Apr 2013 #127

What evidence do you have that is the case? BainsBane Apr 2013 #211

Really? Do you have the stats for that? smirkymonkey Apr 2013 #241

What a horrible ordeal. I'm glad he came forward. redqueen Apr 2013 #110

+1 nt Zorra Apr 2013 #135

+1 La Lioness Priyanka Apr 2013 #254

Rape is Rape and this is a terrible thing. Marrah_G Apr 2013 #139

Suppose that the assault started off as non-sexual Mopar151 Apr 2013 #185

Men rape women, women rape men. haele Apr 2013 #218

Fascinating FightForMichigan Apr 2013 #227

I always hated word problems in math. Warren DeMontague Apr 2013 #231

Rape is horrible no matter who the perpetrator is. Jamastiene Apr 2013 #235

But what was the guy wearing? nt Courtesy Flush Apr 2013 #242

Another MRA-style response, if the sexes were reversed: redqueen Apr 2013 #244

ugh. hope he finds justice. La Lioness Priyanka Apr 2013 #253