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malaise

(289,900 posts)
82. A very short time
Sat Jan 21, 2023, 07:43 AM
Jan 2023

One of my closest friends died last year. She and her hubby made it to 59 years and two weeks when she died last year. He didn’t know what to do with himself. His kids, grandso, siblings and the rest of us friends helped to ease the pain but let him grieve.
Only yesterday he called me and he is in a much better place now. His grandson and girlfriend came home for Christmas and lifted his spirits in ways we couldn’t imagine. They took him to a live reggae show and he took them and grandson’s close friends out to lunch. What he loved most about it is that they wanted to be with him.

He says he is planning to split his prized music collection with his son and grandson. Sure he misses his beloved, but he’s in a much better place a year and three months after her death.

Recommendations

0 members have recommended this reply (displayed in chronological order):

Share your feelings... Cracklin Charlie Jan 2023 #1
Thank you dajoki Jan 2023 #17
I'm so sorry dajoki. It definitely helps to talk about those whom we loved and lost. skylucy Jan 2023 #2
Yes it does... dajoki Jan 2023 #21
Am sooooooooooooooooooooo sorry dajoki. a kennedy Jan 2023 #3
I'm so very sorry, dajoki. Come here to talk about her anytime. hlthe2b Jan 2023 #4
Thank you so much... dajoki Jan 2023 #15
I hope you find peace in your heart ornotna Jan 2023 #5
Peace and love to you and yours. SYFROYH Jan 2023 #6
I'm so sorry. I'm sending you a big hug! 50 Shades Of Blue Jan 2023 #7
Many people here know and feel your pain. Grief is a very lonely Raven Jan 2023 #8
Thank you for sharing this -- it is hard Lettuce Be Jan 2023 #9
My dear dajoki . . . CaliforniaPeggy Jan 2023 #10
Thank you for that, it is appreciated.❤️ dajoki Jan 2023 #23
After my husband died... chillfactor Jan 2023 #11
So very sorry for your loss.. Peacetrain Jan 2023 #12
So sad. But you wife would want you to be happy. LakeArenal Jan 2023 #13
Wonderful! And, if you can, do the things that would make her happy MerryHolidays Jan 2023 #70
You are doing the right thing to connect to your support group. Irish_Dem Jan 2023 #14
I am so sorry for your loss Wicked Blue Jan 2023 #16
So sorry. ❤️ littlemissmartypants Jan 2023 #18
Oh, how sad to hear! Very, VERY Understandable u feel like this ... electric_blue68 Jan 2023 #19
❤️ dajoki Jan 2023 #28
Day because day, hour by hour, minute by minute. Deep, slow breaths, too. electric_blue68 Jan 2023 #30
Sorry for your loss. Someone here mentioned "support group" and I know from personal Eliot Rosewater Jan 2023 #20
This message was self-deleted by its author Raine Jan 2023 #78
I'm so sorry, dajoki🤷‍♀️💕 Cha Jan 2023 #22
Peace to you. denbot Jan 2023 #24
I'm sorry Bettie Jan 2023 #25
Holding you in light and love. Your DU family is here for you. Lean as hard as niyad Jan 2023 #26
I love being a part of this community... dajoki Jan 2023 #91
Sending you peaceful and healing thoughts. nt Trueblue Texan Jan 2023 #27
Hugs snowybirdie Jan 2023 #29
It's ok to share SallyHemmings Jan 2023 #31
... Aristus Jan 2023 #32
Married 47 years. The thought of what you've endured is frightening. Sorry for your loss. spanone Jan 2023 #33
Sure tell us 1 or 2 things that were really great about her vlyons Jan 2023 #34
She was always there for anyone... dajoki Jan 2023 #92
Some days grief is like a gentle rain, other days it's like a raging storm at sea. democrank Jan 2023 #35
I'm so sorry for your loss. area51 Jan 2023 #36
I am very sorry for your loss. Of course you are very sad, and missing her on your anniversary. pnwmom Jan 2023 #37
A very short time malaise Jan 2023 #82
I'm glad you have a loving network of family and friends. As others have said, Tanuki Jan 2023 #38
I am so sorry. 💗. How did you two meet? MLAA Jan 2023 #39
Thank you for sharing dajoki Uncle Joe Jan 2023 #40
Peace and strength to you and family. kairos12 Jan 2023 #41
I am so sorry for your loss. essaynnc Jan 2023 #42
I'm sure you have many, many happy memories of her and the both of you FakeNoose Jan 2023 #43
big hugz Celerity Jan 2023 #44
Thinking of you at this moment Augiedog Jan 2023 #45
"Heavy Heart" is among the most descriptive phrases I can imagine. Stinky The Clown Jan 2023 #46
3 months is a very short time when trying to get used to a new reality. 3catwoman3 Jan 2023 #47
I am so very sorry. onecaliberal Jan 2023 #48
If you feel the need to talk about her dai13sy Jan 2023 #49
So sorry for your loss. Joinfortmill Jan 2023 #50
I'm very sorry for your loss. brer cat Jan 2023 #51
I like to think of the pain as beauty, and as gratitude for someone special lostnfound Jan 2023 #52
We're here for you mcar Jan 2023 #53
Anyone who has lost a loved one knows of what you speak. sellitman Jan 2023 #54
I am at a measly 29 years (27 of marriage) Lithos Jan 2023 #55
don't be afraid to try some therapy RussBLib Jan 2023 #56
((daj)) blm Jan 2023 #57
Wow! 44 years. hamsterjill Jan 2023 #58
(((((((Hugs)))))) UpInArms Jan 2023 #59
Love to you. Hope22 Jan 2023 #60
Blessings on the great memories from the good times! pazzyanne Jan 2023 #61
Sending love and support your way, dajoki. evolves Jan 2023 #62
I'm so sorry, dajoki. highplainsdem Jan 2023 #63
I'm so sorry for your loss, dajoki. BComplex Jan 2023 #64
I am so very sorry Dajoki for the loss of your dear wife. lucca18 Jan 2023 #65
Thank you for reaching out Wild blueberry Jan 2023 #66
wrapping you in love and light proud patriot Jan 2023 #67
So sorry for your loss lindalou65 Jan 2023 #68
I'm glad you are here with us. Big hugs to you. your grief means you loved her. flying_wahini Jan 2023 #69
I hear you. There's just no way you get used to losing Laura PourMeADrink Jan 2023 #71
Thank you for the depth of your feelings UTUSN Jan 2023 #72
Of course you need to share - to know that your pain matters to others, too. And it does. TygrBright Jan 2023 #73
... Nevilledog Jan 2023 #74
I am so sorry for your terrible loss. murielm99 Jan 2023 #75
I am very sorry about your wife Meowmee Jan 2023 #76
Deepest sympathy malaise Jan 2023 #77
A silent hug. Tom Yossarian Joad Jan 2023 #79
Deepest condolences. SheltieLover Jan 2023 #80
It takes time but does get better, dajoki nightwing1240 Jan 2023 #81
Thank you so much... dajoki Jan 2023 #90
❤️I am so sorry for your painful loss. peacebuzzard Jan 2023 #83
I'm terribly sorry for your loss. aocommunalpunch Jan 2023 #84
While I cannot ease your suffering I must say that you are fortunate twodogsbarking Jan 2023 #85
I have not lost my wife Snoopy 7 Jan 2023 #86
Try to focus on the good times you were lucky to share together. Lasher Jan 2023 #87
You feel free to talk about her as much as you wish. OldBaldy1701E Jan 2023 #88
My experience with loss BlueSky3 Jan 2023 #89
dajoki, thank you babylonsister Jan 2023 #93
So sorry! bluestarone Jan 2023 #94
I am so sorry for your loss. pandr32 Jan 2023 #95
Very sorry to hear of your enormous loss. Glad you have a lot of support. Keep the memories alive Evolve Dammit Jan 2023 #96
I totally understand and send love Richluu Jan 2023 #97
So very sorry, dajoki diva77 Jan 2023 #98
Thank you for posting this. Both for yourself and for us. calimary Jan 2023 #99
I'm a recent widow. I really feel for you. Ilsa Jan 2023 #100
Thank you for sharing your loss with us. If we can lift a tiny bit of your burden, it make US better TigressDem Jan 2023 #101
I'm so sorry TuxedoKat Jan 2023 #102
I'm sorry to hear about your loss. I think those of us who have been married for years FEAR the..... usaf-vet Jan 2023 #103
I hope there's some light in your day today, stay strong. dem4decades Jan 2023 #104
The overwhelming care and support... dajoki Jan 2023 #105
So very sorry for your loss. GoneOffShore Jan 2023 #106
You go right ahead!! DFW Jan 2023 #107
I'm so sorry for your loss. BlueLucy Jan 2023 #108
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