Hole in Your Soul!

[jfz9580m]

Last edited Wed Feb 11, 2026, 03:11 PM - Edit history (2)

It is a warning bell of some kind that this is even on the web. I usually only behave unaffectedly around my mom, my ex and my best friend from grad school ;-/.


I was trying to shoot for a more staid and professional demeanor.

Well..things have changed. I doubt that anyone I respect in science, medicine or any of the people I follow would smack me down so I assert my right to exist vociferously protesting whatever a kraken is!

I have rights! What is a kraken anyway?

Well it can have Shalab Kumar, Dmitri Mehlhorn, Reid Hoffman, Vincent Palathingal, Ragy Thomas, Elon and Errol Musk (he is a pedophile!), Mitesh Bohra, Suhail Doshi, Tara MacGowan, Jessica Krause, Blippi (because why not?), Fei Fei Li, Shyam Sankar, Alex Karp, Peter Norvig, Paul Singer, Peter Thiel, Pavel Durov, all of the Atlantic/New Yorker/NYT, Sebastian Thrun, Joe Rogan, Musa Al Gharbi, Lyman Stone, Yasmin Nair, Mark Cuban, Kanury S Rao, Walter Lewin, Matt Lauer, Geoff Marcy, Stephen A Morse, all the MeTooed creeps, Matt Walsh, Christopher Rufo, Larry Ellison, Nick Fuentes, Sundar Pichai, Satya Nadella, Christopher Manning, Priscilla Chan, Clare Wu, Bill Ackman, Neri Oxman, all of the IDW, Stepfanie Tyler, RFK Jr, Olivia Nuzzi, Steve Bannon, Joy Boulamwini, Gita Gambhir, Jeff Bezos, race2dinner, Beverly D’Angelo (no quarter for bogus left ruining the image of the left), all of the Manhattan Institute, Chamath Palihapitiya, Erik Prince, all crypto creeps, Judd Apatow (his movies are an abomination destroying the very fabric of reality), Balaji Srinivasan, Julian Simon, Frances Chance, Nick Fuentes, Candace Owens, Bjorm Lomborg, Renee DiResta, Michael Shellenberger, Yasha Mounck, The Breakthrough Institute, Laura Loomer, Marc Andreessen, Horowitz, Nick Land, Curtis Yarvin, Ambani, Liz Bruenig/Beth Amato/Anthony Galluzzo/Fergie Chambers (with apologies to Yasha Levine/Evgenia Kovda - they are two of my favorite writers out and some of those are their friends, but this is not an academic issue for me and left pronatalism is a scourge; it isn’t the JFK assassination so much as the effects of people who sabotaged family planning when infant mortality rates fell the world over who made the planet this unlivable hellscape where women have fewer and fewer rights; some of us do not get to even consider lives this disconnected from any limits to growth; Sam Miller Macdonald gets it and his book “Progress” is really worth a read; but the Ehrliches got it long back and faced unfair smears from people who unwittingly perpetuated the Cato worldview; Ben Wray of the Jacobin wrote a mindbogglingly inane piece on the topic which demonstrates how broken and mechanical that thought process is), Adani, Jack Ma, Noah Smith, all economists, all of Hollywood/Bollywood etc, Michael Levine, Betsy Hartmann, Naomi Klein, Yasha Mounck, Aaron Elkins, Alex Pentland, Ben Waber, Rosalind Picard, Rana el Kaliouby, Ed Boyden, basically all of the MIT Media Lab, Jim Landay, Keith Humphreys, Ben Wray, Casey Phillips, Slavoj Zizek, Freddie DeBoer, Larry Summers, Park Soon-Shiong, Neil DeGrasse Tyson, Lawrence Krauss, Louis CK, Nina Vasan, Paradiso, Smita Das, Richard Lindzen, David Sacks, Jay Kaspian Kang, Andrea Long Chu (one reason I no longer identify as a liberal are the endless culture wars; class warfare can fall pray to the same trap - I watched a show “Billionaire’s Bunker for a few mins and noted how it shilled a form of class warfare that has nothing to do with solidarity/basic wants and needs but merely a desire to also be one of these jerks and get a cut of a broken pie), Jasmine Tayag, Sabine Hossenfelder, The Discovery Institute, Bobby Azarian, Ezra Klein, Jonathan Haidt, Merrick Garland, Charles Murray, Nick Fuentes, Candace Owens, Derek Thompson, Bill Gates, Russel Vought, Alexandr Wang, JD Vance, Vivek Ramaswamy, Ray Kurzweil, Eliezer Kudkowsky, pretty much every creep in the book “More everything forever”Lucy Guo and all other creeps/charlatans/opportunists/girlbosses/
meninists/earth-destroyers/pronatalists/shopaholics/bunker builders or bunker coveters/Toad eaters/bullies/kayfabe persons/all persons in short whom it is torture to read, hear, register etc etc.
I haven’t decided yet if Melvin Vopson and Robert Lanza are kraken food. Vopson shills blockchain technology so he should probably be fed to Kraken.

A carefully curated and diverse, inclusive collection of creepy, corrupt, opportunistic, hideous and awful people with even some gender parity and both sides politics! Not a person on that list doesn’t deserve to be kraken food.

The kid in sixth sense thought he had problems. I “see and hear” stupid people all the time when I look at our media. Stupid as Andy Nikiforuk would define it not as Charles Murray/Henry Harpending etc would.

I would not generally bet on winning most popularity contests, but most any averagely decent and honest human could beat that collection of sleazebags and maybe I am wrong, but as I infer it, if you just shove some randoms at a Kraken that is enough?

I actually really like all the labs I worked in. They were all truly decent people as was a lab adjacent to my last lab. I realized with surprise while I was worrying about the problem of trust that I would unambiguously trust even the people I had inane spats with. The important thing is “would you trust this person on science in such a complex landscape?” And absolutely yes. So all else is cool.

My doctors have generally been decent. That Mtg Fauci and Hawley Ketanji thing gave me an idea.

I figure if people are randomly being thrown to Kraken, no one would miss any of those people.
Peace on earth!

I blame Troy Farah, Evgenia Kovda, Yasha Levine and the left broadly for pumping me up..I was and largely am planning to stay offline. But this is less kayfabe than elite strategizing 🧐..

I don’t care what anyone says, while Nazi appeasement doesn’t work, I totally champion outrunning Kraken by throwing random dislikable creeps to it. At the very least it would be one of the more confusing spectacles allowing one to beat a quiet retreat from what DUer flashman correctly identified as crazytown 🤭. Desperate times call for desperate measures!

Anyway I have to make some serious posts because I have to file some real complaints. For decent humans at all levels to be safe from their efforts and lives being destroyed, you have to ensure that all creeps and sleazebags face a real check.

As a marijuana user and generally mildly disreputable scientist (mostly just bad jokes which I stand by..if these creeps can break everything, why can’t I suggest some alternatives to tormenting public sector workers? I will no longer be quelled even if that person Kent Anderson disapproves! He is lucky he is not on my list of Kraken food..He is kind of preachy, but I have grudgingly concluded that one could not in good conscience justify feeding him to Kraken. I have standards!)

Some things finally make sense and it is a relief on the one hand with the parts of the scientific community I was always fond of. Nothing scares me more than bad science (all that llm garbage) or dishonesty. It is why Yasha Levine for instance has been so important to me in what I used to think of as a dark time, but now view more as a confusing time with some really horrible and self serving people.

I can and do forgive errors - science and medicine are hard. I can’t forgive genuinely not caring and not even recognizing that because you are so puffed up in yourself.

The penny has kinda dropped in a way and it is alarming on the one hand, but not entirely an infinity away from something very, very, very, very, very, very, very, far from optimism..

And a big part of it is restored faith in things making sense where they are things one cares about.

Troy Farah is awesome. Nothing makes one feel as certain of being discounted sometimes as being an Environmentalist out of love for earth and its animals and flora for their own sake (Chris Ketcham, Nandita Bajaj, the Ehrliches, Chris Packham, Marina Bolotnikova etc would understand). And yet this looks scary. Part of the serious action I will be taking with cross verification is to ensure that the web of life (ecological or human systems that are acceptable) do not get turned into cynical marketing and social engineering tools.


Anyway at I truly owe the Left humanists (the Greens are my own morose Barn 8 ilk - ;-/) - you guys here and Yasha Levine, Evgenia Kovda, Troy Farah/the Salon team (minus food), Sam Miller Macdonald, Nathan Robinson/Current Affairs, Ed Zitron, Briahna Joy Gray, Matt Stoller, Alec Karakatsanis etc. I feel politically lonely more than socially..but after I got cut off from my colleagues and lost my mom, there really was a hole in my heart I guess ;-/..
But the left healed it and I always think of the left when I listen to this. I am not usually big on music.


But I had a dual dedication to make. Everything is conserved.
This is dedicated to all the kraken food I described 🤭:

This is dedicated to Yasha Levine, Evgenia Kovda, Troy Farah, Nathan Robinson..I really was sickening from the type of bilge that passes for media..I am a pretty cheerful person adjusted for this hideous background. But Ruth Cain nailed it in here piece “Neoliberalism is bad for your mental health”. And reading what passes for mainstream social commentary (let alone the right) makes it worse..

I like the part where she goes:

The songs you sing are too romantic
Ah-haa (ah-haa)
And when you want the truth
They only spit in your eye
Oh yeah, they're only telling you lies
Oh yeah, there's gotta be rock'n roll
To fill the hole in your soul

I usually think of Evgenia Kovda at that part. She is pretty cool..I used to be able to kick out morons. But the years took their toll, but because of a very cool vegan lady locally and Evgenia, I kind of grew my backbone back which creeps, meninists and girlbossing in combination had pretty much destroyed. I agree with Yasha that the net is a toxic waste dump a lot. But paradoxically the rare things I found like their site I did find via the net. 90-95% of it was junk though and will be checked.
As with Harjinder Singh, irresponsibility at scale is not an option anywhere.

Stewart/Colbert 2028!
I have rights! I can’t keep being mired in stupidity!
*judiciously* Brian Driscoll strikes me as high quality Kraken. Shame he is out of work.

[jfz9580m]

1. Reid Hoffman is a total creep (TLDR ;-/)

Last edited Wed Feb 11, 2026, 12:54 PM - Edit history (2)

I am always in two minds when I post. But the main reason for this post is that it is genuinely decent of EarlG to give me a forum.
And when people allow you use of a forum, under circumstances like these, you owe them genuine honesty. EarlG I do think would believe me when I say that I would never use DU to shitpost or casually “raise my profile” for products that don’t exist. Though as a non-influencer I am going to give a shoutout to a few small businesses locally as they are examples of how the more decent people in all sectors are screwed over.

While I am grimly preparing another round of kraken food, I get genuine pleasure from building other humans up and only tear people down when it is absolutely essential. It is clear to me now that there is a kind of brutal arbitrariness and balance in nature such that if poorly regulated systems are permitted to escalate unfair and stupid things along with random brutality, the better people are always targeted by the worst. Which I have been observing with ever increasing grimness, I kid you not.


It should also be clear except to blatantly disgenuous operatives who dog me at least locally, that I have no wish to be anything but an anonymous publicly funded scientist in my own damn field.


I am vaguely under the impression that nature quite possibly intended for me to be a very different type of woman, who doesn’t really go off topic by choice and certainly never attracts unwanted attention deliberately (Liu Cixin’s dark forest but mainly worry about telemarketers, scammers, politicians, influencers or possibly even worse).


I am less worried about creeps or catty people these days as long as they are not also stupid.

If you cannot distinguish between someone who (while unverified by various scammy little lie detectors, emotion ai and bot or not tests) is a human who is forced to weigh in for various reasons I will spell out over time, then I cannot see that constant attempts at appeasement of such persons is anything but idiocy.

I can assure anyone with a still functioning brain
never had any wish to enter any disgraceful online frays. But I am starting to get the sense that some people who are not trolls and jerks sometimes wish people like me would weigh in more. As much as I am dubious sometimes.
There is nothing I condemn so much as shit stirring or breaking things.

I repeat myself sometimes because some things are worth repeating - one reason I dislike those Si Valley creeps who move fast and break shit so much is that-1) how irresponsible do you have to be to inflict large amounts of collateral damage that way? But well ok, I was myself a bumbling fool who broke things so often it seemed like the height of charlatanry to scold people 😤. The difference is that I cannot remember a time when I was not extremely embarrassed and ashamed. Early on because one would get yelled at true.

But over time more from seeing the amount of care and thought my colleagues and doctors etc put into things. That pretty much anyone I trust from delivery boys, people who prepare food or do any damn decent job honestly put in that you would have to be such an ass not to give a shit.

Now there is a corollary, a lot of the problem with reality aside from the move fast bros is people who have a truly superficial understanding of reality but huff and puff no matter how many indications there are all around you that our world is interconnected and more and more obviously. Sheldon Whitehouse’s video in E&E alludes to this.

This was an understanding I had early in life.

(More on the way..;-/ ..I blame Troy Farah..I was totally hoping to use Yasha Levine’s posts which do not apply to this situation to justify staying offline.. And like President Trump, I shall eventually “weave” my way back to the original point. I switch between the styles of the lefty internet troll for all that I condemn kayfabe/trolling and the coldly correct style of the publicly funded or citizen scientist. It is not clear to me that one can address this brutal and absurd mess without troll adjacent styles sometimes.

But while I certainly have no intention of ever coming to the US, one reason for alarm is my genuine concern in a transactional and unprincipled world that lionizes “winners”, that the USA going this way means the emergence of China as a superpower and I part ways with the dirtbag left I am normally in wrt seeing that as any kind of positive.
Musk has deep ties in China and it is the most successful authoritarian power we have. So I consider it another of Chomsky’s many mistakes and one of Robinson’s few that they don’t get how scary that type of fascism as opposed to this more cartoon version would be. I have some idea unfortunately.

I say this as someone with no view of national security as anything but strictly utilitarian. I mean my main muses are Yasha Levine and Evgenia Kovda. But as I put some things together I understand why people who normally are not prone to confusing methodologies need one to get the various really creepy traps of stupidity ahead.
).

It is the music appreciation forum!
I have many doubts about being online ;-/. But if bullshit jobs are the bane of modern society, no publicly funded or citizen scientist can eschew shit work, whatever its unexpected form.

I have many concerns about doing what at the end of the day is uncomfortably close to shitposting.
And yes I don’t deny a certain (if somewhat hollow if this goes nowhere) pleasure at the thought of throwing some of the targets of my ire like Peter Norvig to whatever the fuck a kraken is.

Don’t go around writing awful pieces in Noema shilling these fucking awful technologies if you don’t want people (well me anyway) to fervently think “Yeah this guy really should be fed to the kraken”. And that is obviously not a call for violence etc. I cannot idiotproof the web that guys like Norvig shill so enthusiastically.
Presumably shill that is..

It doesn’t take ADD for about 1 minute to be as long as one can stand to read anything that guy writes.
I mean, maybe he is a nice person, but I doubt it.

This is as all happening as many of my real world friends in science or other areas (especially pooer people I have lost touch with in the US-service workers on the fringes of the music industry etc) are not doing that well. And I have lost patience with blatantly bogus pretences of roleplaying an ostrich or a really, genuinely stupid woman for not having a conversational response to some of this after years of mind boggling stupidity that should not yet again as in Dr Fauci’s target the best people around.

The attacks on Dr.Fauci, one of the rare public figures that even someone as jaded as I am genuinely respects, made a deep impression on me. I would hate anyone I ever knew or cared about to be unfairly attacked like that and well if these guys want to destroy the public sector and well-regulated systems maybe this is an early warning signal of the arbitrariness of something like the monster in Nope and guys like Norvig (again presumably) who love The Spectacle.

I really mostly hate to do this. But between all of you, people with money/power/influence etc you have built/made a society that is increasingly entirely unlivable in, in any sane way and someone -even people like me who hate to give an opportunity to the dimmest attention seeker or reflexively argumentative fake contrarian who fails to get that someone living in the proper real accidentally stumbled into these bullshit worlds of media, politics, internet fluff and the private sector, and can no longer hold back. I kept trying to go back to the real and found that maybe I will have to yell to clear a path so I can do that.
I am not “tough” online and a wilting willow (the name of a stupid Google chip those creeps probably use to simulate clunky multiverses all of which have one thing in common - they suck) offline. But thanks to people like Norvig (it was a really terrible piece and no one who reads it should fail to register that if they like it they are legit candidates for kraken food themselves) now it isn’t easy to disentangle oneself without conflict.
This isn’t The Spectacle because I will take every form of real world action to bolster this since I am finally resigned to having to post online so no foul crap continues to grow unregulated or try to pirate and hijack more of my real world or virtual spaces assuming that everyone everywhere is a lame, attention hungry and somewhat stupid person who cannot see through inane ruses.
This disgraceful attempt I see growing to sow confusion to mask who you truly are is as blatantly stupid as it is tiresome.

Rather than shitposters online, oddly enough lately I have been thinking of a certain type of extremely respectable real world scientist or the most responsible type of online far lefty when posting. Because there is too much bs by now in what the notion of a Serious Person is as bullies and sycophants thrive in autocratic, dictatorial and senseless societies.

(Speaking of which, I totally think Indivisible should take Reid Hoffman’s tainted wealth as long as it doesn’t affect the integrity of their work. These guys have hoarded wealth to a point where one is forced to back one’s favorite non-profits/causes/people from the Humane League to Current Affairs to Yasha Levine/Christopher Ketcham etc taking money wherever they can find it for all of the survival of anything that doesn’t suck).

I am fortunate in having a fairly robust cushion. But worried that if this keeps up soon all systems will break so badly it will hard to survive. And even I cannot afford more days lost to drivel…

[jfz9580m]

2. Pointless Machines built by Opaque, Deregulated Kakistocracies

These days, try as I do to focus on my real work, as a citizen scientist, I am too dismayed by the implications of some of what I see, especially given the knowledge of the devastating effects on my own human life and my mom’s of clunky rollouts of stuff where anything potentially cool is mired with parasitic, dishonest junkware.

I do not favor throwing the proverbial baby out with the bathwater, but I do need to know sooner rather than much later which is which. And for any further growth or construction in or contiguous to any of the three properties I am a joint owner of (0000F5D7 is the ID as Tata knows).
As the Yimbies and other pro deregulation and pilfering with sad kayfabe types explode I cannot continue to be stripped of a say in the use of my own assets, not to mention continued violations of my civil rights.

The web of life is an amazing thing. A year ago I read about Tejas Thackeray and took a liking to the guy, because of his implicit understanding of that. He talked about how everything in nature is interconnected
Nature can be brutal, but for the most part it is remarkably efficient. Killing is relatively swift and occurs only as needed.
By contrast, in an Idiocracy especially, human built systems are slow, wasteful, mind boggling cruel and favor the appearance of efficiency over the real thing. Alison Taylor wrote a piece on corrupt firms which captures the dynamic.
And with societies as broken as ours are on even the most obvious environment friendly stances it is alarming.

Factory farms or equally vile wet markets are not just horrifically cruel, they are a breeding ground for disease. One of the better articles in The New Republic pointed out that maybe wanting cheap eggs is itself the problem. It is not truly utopian to keep sowing seeds for worsening polycrises.

Further, by 2026 extreme cruelty to animals is not a “cultural” issue to embrace. In both Western and Eastern traditions there are far better things to point to with pride than wet markets and factory farms.

If we had a press that was less of an embarrassment to everything instead of fawning sycophantically on some guys whose main talent is scamming “suckers”, they would grasp far more

It brings me to my second point from the previous post, If you were actually that bright you would unambiguously be able to move fast without breaking shit. If you need to basically buy up the govt and destroy regulations so you can pollute space, breed prolifically while huffing ketamine and boasting about rocket explosions, odds are you are a sign of a profoundly and more scarily irreparably broken society rather than the genius.

I recently read a book by Adam Becker, who is really cool and an actually really intelligent and characteristically humble typical scientist.
But even he disappointly cannot come and outright admit that these guys are stupid. There is such a thing as too much humility and it afflicts many of the better adults (who are also less susceptible to the juggernauts these idiots visit on people like me)

Everything described in his book documents a spiralling out of control Idiocracy.

And yet even he does not dispute the notion that this lunatic thugocracy (Marc Andreessen, Elon Musk, a truly nightmarish person called Ray Kurzweil) is full of geniuses rather than a scarier variation on 1984’s scurrying beetle like men. And that is the type that thrives in what has long been an Idiocracy

I really cannot condemn our press enough. This is why I find reading the average mainstream piece of media akin to light torture. They describe as geniuses some guys who can write some code and then dropout and learn how to game “suckers”.

If you look at publicly funded science the barrier by contrast is often really high. And that is right. You don’t want science to ever be a field where the barriers to entry are low and easy to game.

I was always very aware that if you break something, you inconvenience a large number of people and destroy expensive precision instrumentation and generally turn into the type of person who is rightly reviled.
But at my last workplace (the first marketplace friendly workplace I ever worked in) for the first time ever I noticed something alarming. The side by side coexistence of genuinely brilliant (and strained, stressed and unhappy seeming) scientists and a collection of this fatuous idiot type who really doesn’t seem to give a shit.
I would end up seeing that again over and over and over in some form or another.