Fairly certain you could go back in time and teach cavemen germ theory, plate tectonics, and heliocentrism

[Scott Alan Swaggerty]

Before you could convince anyone in the year 2004 that 22 years later Tiger Woods is getting DUIs and the reality TV show host guy has tanked the economy but is somehow seen as Jesus by like a quarter of the country.

They'd medicate you so fast your head would spin.

[RockRaven]

1. Unlike MAGAts and reality show watchers, cave men had fully functional human brains.

[ret5hd]

2. and what medication, exactly, would they give you?

hope it involves mushrooms.

[Scott Alan Swaggerty]

3. I'm curious what the intake form would look like

"Patient is insistent that a reality TV host would devastate the world economy in the future"

[fujiyamasan]

4. The only believable part is

That we’d be in war with Iran.

[Scott Alan Swaggerty]

5. You'd definitely have to open with that

[muriel_volestrangler]

6. Not sure where Tiger Woods comes into this

Semi-retired sports star drives under the influence of something? It's par for the course, so to speak.